i want realistic modern fantasy like
someone finding a dragon egg and livetweeting the process of trying to hatch it (with no prior knowledge on how a dragon egg should be hatched)
a guy selling an enchanted sword on craigslist
a tattoo artist who does spell runes but for really mundane stuff like conjuring a bound demonic pen or for summoning your keys
summoning a demon for the vine
selfies with mermaids
prank calling wizards
there should be a dating website called ebae
Okay, so in Science class yesterday we were talking about sleep cycles and melatonin and my science teacher said, “if you’re trying to sleep, avoid one colour. Blue. Your melatonin levels decrease when looking at the colour blue because it’s the colour of the sky.” GUYS, I KNOW WHY NONE OF US SLEEP. TUMBLR IS BLUE.
THE JIG IS UP, YOU SNEAKY BASTARDS. WE’RE ONTO YOU.
Internet history won’t tell you anything, if parents really want to know what their kids are up to check their most recent emojis
oh. my. god.
I’m going to fucking cry.
I fucking love dogs
"YOU SICK BASTARD" I shout
Jon Snow starts to cry. He has been fighting off this flu for a week and has been eating lots of citrus. He’s doing his best.
when u think about it you’re either a shift or caps lock person
i can’t believe people get so angry about a bisexual spider-man. whatever. have your shitty bi/homophobic opinions. you’re an asshole anyway. i just can’t believe you’re robbing everyone of all the glorious ‘swings both ways’ jokes
Devonté Hynes // Palo Alto from the original motion picture Palo Alto (2014)
i practice bisexuality because i want to be a better bisexual. a faster bisexual. a stronger bisexual. i came here to WIN